Wednesday, August 25, 2010


You know when you get one of those Duh moments, where the light goes on and you think why did I not think of it before? Well I had one of those moments.

Well it is as simple and as complicated as hmmm common sense? Common sense is not as common as we think. And no that is not it.

You know we live our entire life trying to fit into this particular stereotype that either society imposes on us or self imposed and if we do not fit that role - oh oh you are in trouble.

The perfect child, the perfect spouse, the perfect parent, the perfect employee/employer, etc etc

For most of us it is like hammering a square peg into a round hole. Ouch! No wonder we are bruised...

We try very hard to find a square peg - and some of us find it but most of us don't.

Rev 1 - We are all similar yet unique in our outlook, talents, perspective etc. We all have some talent in us, some skill that in inherent and needed to complete some task small or big does not really matter, just know that what you have to give is important in the whole bigger picture.

Rev 2- We all have our opinions on how people should be, how they should react to any given situation, how they need to live their lives because let's face it we want things to be our way or...
Uh huh - wake up call... We all have our good and bad. Only if one experiences the bad can one appreciate the good and vice versa. The biggest thing that mars or destroys any relationship, no matter what kind is "Expectation" Huge ramifications. We all have it, me included, whether we acknowledge it or not, whether consciously or sub consciously we expect something in return
and it flusters us when we do not get it. I think a lot of us will find peace and happiness when we let go of "expecting" something in return and just do things because you want to and not because you have to.

Rev 3- Pride, Ego, Trust, Fear, Vulnerability, Failure all govern our lives.
Pride - We all have that some more than others. It is, intertwined, with ego and fear, failure and vulnerability. We feel that if we do give in or acknowledge our weakness that it makes you inferior...but I personally think it only helps and how? Here is my take on it:) Pride and ego just get in the way of one achieving or getting what they want. Because of those emotions, we refuse to look at the problem from all angles. We are so overwhelmed with the way people perceive us that most if not all actions are governed by that.

Most of our actions are done with the fact in our mind, consciously or sub consciously, we all hunger for appreciation, accolades, applause, compliments, motivation because that gives us the impetus, the incentive to try harder. It is innate in our psyche to be appreciated and as that should be. That is the simple reason why a compliment, a positive comment brings a smile on our face.

Such a simple yet profound revelation I had was this. All it really really takes is a genuine heartfelt compliment, comment, smile, hug, to make the other person feel special. And you know what the kicker is....making the other person happy is guaranteed to put a smile on your face, a spring in your step. Don't believe me? Try it....Compliment a total stranger, smile, hold the door open for someone, help someone who is not expecting your help, surprise someone with something special, pick up the phone and connect. It is a wonderful feeling. Truly it is.